Wednesday 28 April 2010


Like your steak well done?

Let me tell you a story....it’s a true story, this one. Well....I might have embellished it a bit.

Elijah decided enough was enough. The evil king Ahab had reigned for too long. The wicked priests of Baal were teaching the people of Israel do do all sorts of wrong things, deeply immoral things, even murder.
‘Why did you do that?’
‘Baal told me to.’
Worshipping Baal was an excuse to do what you like.
‘Forget God, he’s just a spoilsport.’
Sound familiar?

Now Elijah was just an ordinary man from Tishbe, might just as well have been Roxby. But God had appointed Elijah to change things and the time was now. So came the famous contest on the top of a mountain, big crowd, TV crew, the lot. The odds looked stacked against Elijah from the start. He was God’s only prophet. And there were 450 priests of Baal. But we know something they didn’t. When God is with you anything’s possible.

A big lorry rolls up: ‘Delivery for Mr Elijah: 2xdead bulls. 2xfelled trees. 2xspades. 2xaxes. 2xmeat cleavers. 3000xbottles of spring water.’ You could see the crowd were puzzled. Could it be an early Masterchef? But no matches. And what’s with the bottled water?

‘Now all you 450 wicked priests of Baal come here,’ said Elijah.
‘Listen all you people who’ve come to watch. Get this on TV. If Almighty God is the Boss then do what HE wants. If Baal is the Boss then do what HE wants.’
Huh?

Right.. Two separate barbecues. Recipe for each: Dig a trench. Chop up trees. Place in trench. Chop up bulls. Place on wood. Cook bulls.

Problem……no matches....can’t light fire!
But that was Elijah’s plan, ‘This barbecue says God’s the Boss, that one says Baal’s the Boss,’ he said. ‘No matches. If Baal lights his fire, he’s the real one. If God lights his fire, he’s the real one.’

Ready, Steady, Sacrifice.

OK so the wicked priests of Baal got cracking with their favourite fire-raising dance:
‘Come on Baal
Don’t make us wail
We really musn’t fail
Fire this bull from his nose to his tail.’
2 hours later: ‘Come on Baal’ etc x 3
And what happened?
Nothing, zilch, nicht
Not even a singed eyebrow.
Where’s Baal gone then? On a journey? To the loo?

Now all this time Elijah had been sitting by his chopped up bull apparently doing nothing.
‘Right you 450 wicked priests of Baal come here and watch. Now you wondered what the bottled water was for didn’t you? Pour them over my bull and wood.’
‘Right…..do you think this lot will burn?’ No answer.
Now Elijah didn’t do any fire-raising dance, no happy-clappy-lets-see-if-we-can-get-God-going, no headbanging or anything like that. He just waited until all eyes were on him and then said ‘Almighty God, please do it.’ And God did.
Total cremation. Zap. Bull, tree, water all gone. Just a hint of steak in the air….rather well-done.

Impressed? So you should be. Our God can do the impossible…..have you discovered that for yourself?

He really is God Almighty…. NO BULL !

(PS…it’s in the Bible: 1 Kings Ch 18)